Monthly Archives: October 2015

GOP Debate Round 3

Have you stopped choking on your food yet?

This debate makes eating really hard. It also makes for a night involving a lot of “do you need some ice for that burn” moments and that little fire emoji. #ohsnap

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Adversarial doesn’t even begin to characterize this debate. Buckle up! It’s a loud ride tonight.

1. First of all, how about that answer Ted Cruz gave about the debt ceiling? How insightful and knowledgeable! I learned so much about his hate for the media, so of course I have to vote for him to handle our country’s financials!

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2. Then, we learned how Jeb and Marco really don’t have a bromance going on. Bush thinks Rubio needs to step up or step down (also the next Step Up movie subtitle) #haters

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3. I just can’t look at Trump without seeing an emoji. At least he’s a great spokesman for why to not do Botox; I’ve never seen eyebrows shot so far up someone’s forehead before.

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Donald Trump arrives to his Comedy Central Roast in New York, Wednesday, March 9, 2011. (AP Photo/Charles Sykes)

Donald Trump arrives to his Comedy Central Roast in New York, Wednesday, March 9, 2011. (AP Photo/Charles Sykes)

4. The Republican candidates LOVE the media. I mean, wow. The love is real and real deep. Cruz spent so much time talking about his hate for the media that even the media started hating themselves….. for letting him talk at all….

5. Trump doesn’t lie. All the articles that have ever been written about him are wrong. “I don’t know who’s doing the fact-checking here” said Trump….no one can figure out what side of an argument you’re going to take next, sir.

6. Wait, Mike Huckabee is still in this race? Hmm…okay.

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7. The fight for time to speak by candidates is like when children fight for the swings at recess. “It’s MY TURN!”

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8. The candidates are keeping such close tabs on each others’ time to speak that when it’s their turn to talk they forget what they stand for. They actually forget to talk about anything except how they didn’t get enough time. The last guy who complained about that didn’t have the best ending….Mr. Webb #LostTribute

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9. WAIT, CHRIS CHRISTIE IS STILL HERE? He just started talking….and it’s been an hour into the debate. I just choked (again) when his slight lisp piped up. Welcome to the debate!

10. You know who Huckabee is voting for! (Hint: It’s the orange candidate with a permanent wind-blown face)

11. Christie doesn’t like Fantasy Football talk….he just lost the votes of all males from the age 25 – 45 #sorrynotsorry

Cheers to our future!

xOx

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Things to Stop Asking Twentysomethings

We get it. We should have more of our crap together at this point in our life. The constant questioning is not going to help us figure things out, though. So get out of the interrogation room and let us be….free. We know what you really mean when you ask us things; you’re not as sly as you think, sir.

Here’s what you ask us….and here’s what we hear….

1. So…any wedding bells ringing soon?

What we hear: Are you seriously still single? You’re going to die alone, you know that right?

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2. Any exciting job offers?

What we hear: You’re going to be unemployed forever so better go pick out your box to live in.

3. How’s grad school?

What we hear: Have you failed out yet? You know that Cs don’t get degrees in grad school, right?

4. Are you living out on your own yet?

What we hear: How long will you mooch off your parents? Poor mom and dad would like to retire.

5. Time to start thinking long-term. Finances are a pain, am I right?

What we hear: You’re already behind on everything regarding stability in your life.

6. Remember the good old days of undergrad?!

What we hear: You are older than the dust under my fridge and now have no life.

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7. What do you miss the most from college?

What we hear: You’re no longer in college….wait, what?

8. How’s the real life treating you so far?

What we hear: Have you failed yet? Because you are going to sooner or later…

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xOx

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Biden’s Announcement

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What the Vice President’s announcement yesterday really told us was:
He’s human. 

Biden admitted to still grieving; he’s not trying to pretend it is all behind him. By doing this, he is relating to us, the citizens, even more. He is not acting like he’s stronger than us. Grief is a human reaction and we are all human. It is so unfortunate what is happened to his son and family, but some think he could use this to be passionate about the candidacy. That may very well be true, but we have to also accept that his grieving is not finished, and he acknowledges this could impact his campaign.

He’s honest. 

Biden did not try to fake anything or convince us otherwise. He wanted to explain to all of his supporters why their desire for him to run is not feasible. He does not want to commit to something and later let the people down. He knows what is expected of a candidate and realizes he is not capable of that full capacity right now. He’s one of few politicians, who have admitted his/her incapability to do something.

What does this all say? 

Joe Biden would have been a great candidate, but it’s not the time.

Best wishes, Joe! Thanks for being an awesome, train-loving, vocal, equality-pushing VP 

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Breakdown of the Democratic Debate

The good ‘ole Donkey Debate. Bring on the blue!

Let’s just begin by saying this debate started off a bit slower than the Republican debate. However, these candidates are collectively about 450 years old, you need to remember. With that, it just means some good old fashion bickering is expected!

Bernie forgetting where he was in his sentence while simultaneously yelling his strong beliefs. Hillary staying sassy and not backing down from a good verbal fight (on guard!). O’Malley trying to prove he deserves to be there. Webb may be in the wrong place. And whoever that last guy is needs some love and attention, too.

First of all, WHERE IS JOE BIDEN…….

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“Uhhhh…I was supposed to be where?”

Second, Lincoln Chafee looks like a kid who just got told Santa really does exist.

NEW YORK, NY - SEPTEMBER 30: Lincoln Chafee visits FOX Business Network at FOX Studios on September 30, 2015 in New York City. (Photo by Rob Kim/Getty Images) ORG XMIT: 582326837 ORIG FILE ID: 490713554

Photo by Rob Kim/Getty Images) ORG XMIT: 582326837 ORIG FILE ID: 490713554

“Yay I’m so happy to be here! What did I sign up for, again?”

Third, Jim Webb is only there because CNN realized they needed someone to fill the empty podium left for Biden

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“I’d like a turn to speak please…..” [an hour into the debate]

Fourth, Hillary Clinton has got her sass out and wearing it proudly.

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“Do you have a comment [about the Benghazi emails], Mrs. Clinton?”   “No.”

Fifth, Bernie reminds me of being yelled at by my grandpa. I feel like I really have to agree with him; just nod yes!

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“FREE TUITION COLLEGES!” “MIDDLE CLASS TAKEOVERS” – Sir, yes sir! #fistpump

Lastly, Martin O’Malley……I do deserve to be here.

Martin O'Malley, former governor of Maryland and 2016 Democratic presidential candidate, speaks at the Congressional Hispanic Caucus Institute conference in Washington, D.C., U.S., on Wednesday, Oct. 7, 2015. While next Tuesday's first Democratic presidential debate will probably lack the name-calling and sharp jabs of the Republican face-offs, there's still potential for strong disagreements between the party's leading contenders. Photographer: Andrew Harrer/Bloomberg via Getty Images

Photographer: Andrew Harrer/Bloomberg via Getty Images

“Please remember my name. Also, I want to fight Hillary a little”

Oh, there are other moderators than just Anderson Cooper?

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No.

xOx

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