Stages of St. Patrick’s Day Shenanigans 

The good ‘ole day of the Irish! The day when 80% of the population claims to be from the Emerald Isle. The parties are crazy and the times are good.

Everyone knows they have partied a little too hard with their fellow leprechauns, sloshed a little too much green beer on themselves, kissed too many red-bearded men. I think a lot of you can relate to these turn of events:

1. You trash your room looking for something green to wear

Crushed it. Even her underwear is green, I bet.

2. You start counting down the hours to when you can hit the parties 

I bet you look that dang cute, too. But probably not.

3.  Everything is green, like everything. 

Green beer really lasts a long time in your system, fair warning.

4. The men are trying way too hard to be Irish for the “Kiss me, I’m Irish” stunt

I can see you under that scratchy, carrot-based beard, good sir.

5. You forget how many drinks you’ve had so far and start chanting that you’re Iwishhhh

You’re the happiest dang person around, completely oblivious to your surroundings and your lack of Irish heritage.


6. True Irish folk are sitting in their normal bar stool completely judging you 

Look at these poor fools, only having one day of the year to be as cool as us.

7. You’ve really gone overboard on the drinks and everyone starts looking creepily alike 

Is it just me, or does everyone in here have red hair and freckles right now?

8. When your friend is pinched for the thousandth time because she was not wearing green…

She pours green beer on her shirt and looks around yelling “I’M WEARING GREEN NOW, YA HAPPY?”

9. Then you realize tomorrow is a Friday, and you have to party all over again  

Crashing home at 4am is definitely acceptable because if you think about it, you’ll do it again in 24hrs. Consistency is key!

So Happy St. Patrick’s day, everyone! And you’re welcome for letting you act as cool as us, true Irish folk for a day.



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