Tag Archives: 2016

What We Really Want for Christmas

It’s that time of year again that requires you to buy everyone, who you’ve ever crossed paths with, a gift. And your family repeatedly asks for what you want as a present.

The truth is, what we really actually want, no one can buy for us.

 

1. Calorie-less food that doesn’t taste like vegetables

im-getting-real-sick-tired-food-having-calories-ecard:

 

2. Money (like a lot)

However, it's hard when everything costs your soul and more.

 

3. A job that doesn’t suck…well, maybe just a job will work

How hard it's going to be for me to find a job after I leave my present one.lol,my town has no need for art majors:

 

4. A re-do on the whole election thing

Follow✭ @badgalronnie ✭:

 

5. The ability to be socially chill around our crushes

↞ real eyes, realize, real lies ↠:

 

6. The chance to erase our middle school years

Wow. That looks....um...nice on you ostrich!:

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T-Minus 31 Days…

…to panic because 2016 will soon be over. Holy failed bucket list for the second decade in a row. How is it that 11 months can go by so quickly? And how is it that I am such a procrastinator? [I planned on writing this days ago and look what I’m doing now]

 

Every year we make the Great List of To Dos and every year we get maybe two marked off, which are typically the “go to gym” (went twice this year #crushedit) and “save money” (got enough stars at Starbucks for a free drink #doublecrushedit). But, everything else still has yet to be crossed out as per usual.

 

My question is: why do we set such high standards for ourselves? Here are a few reasons why we don’t get things marked off our bucket list:

 

1. We’re poor

Funny Pictures Of The Day - 28 Pics:

 

2. We truly have zero motivation

Haha, how about in shape for any time of year.:

 

3. It takes too much time to plan things

I don't think so!! grumpy cat memes - Cat memes - kitty cat humor funny joke…                                                                                                                                                                                 More:

 

4. “Find a Significant Other” never counts

Las Vegas Funny Images (01:40:04 PM, Sunday 04, September 2016 PDT) – 80 pics:

 

5. We don’t write down realistic things

Cooking food for themselves. | 19 Things All Lazy People Don't Have Time For:

6. We aren’t honest with ourselves

On my to- do list!  Hahaha:

 

Until next time, 

xOx

 

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Finally the End Begins – Iowa

Tonight marks the start of the beginning of the end. The Iowa Caucus has begun and that means we are finally beginning the journey to the end of this political chaos.

We all know what the candidates say on the outside; the lies and blasphemy they blurt to appease the largest group of people. But what are they really thinking? Wouldn’t it be good to know what’s going on inside? Let’s take a look at the candidates from their campaigning shenanigans this past week and see what they are actually thinking:

Hillary Clinton is really thinking: Did someone remember to put that stupid Iowa flag up? I’ve gotten really suck up to these Iowians…is that a word? Note to self: have my assistant look that up later… “Um what did you ask, again?”

 

Trump is really thinking: Mhmm, yes, yes, this is going to look GREAT to all those Evangelists. I hope someone is taking a photo of this moment. Let me purse my lips to make it look like I am actually feeling His presence. Jokes on you, Christians! 

Rubio is actually thinking: I hope no one notices me sweating. Please don’t notice, please don’t notice, please don’t…. Oh no, these spotlights are not working for me, are they?

 

Paul is actually thinking: I believe… I believe that….I believe that I can win, I believe that I can win….c’mon Rand, you got this, eyes on the prize, stand strong, you’ve got this. Best. Pep-talk. Ever.

 

Santorum is actually thinking: Ha ha ha, check it out errrrybody. Nobody knows that I pretended this was Trump while I shot. Slayed him.

 

Kasich is really thinking: Nailed that fist bump. Did anyone see that? I crushed it with a millennial. GO JOHN GO.

 

Cruz is actually think: Hehe that is tickling my ear. And that’s all he’s got going up top.  

Bush is thinking: I’m actually talking to an empty room. Luckily no one really watches me to know that, though.

O’Malley, poor guy, is thinking: This about sums it up. Only my fist makes it in focus for the photo.

Fiorina is thinking: Are the lights on? Did they not realize that I’m the guest speaker? I’m just going to keep talking straight into the souls of my audience.

 

Christie is actually thinking: Did they have to put a mirror right there? I already have two chins, now I have four thanks to those jerks…… MIRRORS ARE THE DEMISE OF SOCIETY AND THEY WILL KILL US SOMEDAY IF NO ACTION IS TAKEN.  

And, lastly, Sanders is thinking: Hey you over there, yeah, you, Mr. Ghost. I know you’re back listening to me and I will continue to point you out until everyone else sees you, too. Arg grrr ar gggg.

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