GOP Debate Round 3

Have you stopped choking on your food yet?

This debate makes eating really hard. It also makes for a night involving a lot of “do you need some ice for that burn” moments and that little fire emoji. #ohsnap

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Adversarial doesn’t even begin to characterize this debate. Buckle up! It’s a loud ride tonight.

1. First of all, how about that answer Ted Cruz gave about the debt ceiling? How insightful and knowledgeable! I learned so much about his hate for the media, so of course I have to vote for him to handle our country’s financials!

2. Then, we learned how Jeb and Marco really don’t have a bromance going on. Bush thinks Rubio needs to step up or step down (also the next Step Up movie subtitle) #haters

3. I just can’t look at Trump without seeing an emoji. At least he’s a great spokesman for why to not do Botox; I’ve never seen eyebrows shot so far up someone’s forehead before.

Donald Trump arrives to his Comedy Central Roast in New York, Wednesday, March 9, 2011. (AP Photo/Charles Sykes)

4. The Republican candidates LOVE the media. I mean, wow. The love is real and real deep. Cruz spent so much time talking about his hate for the media that even the media started hating themselves….. for letting him talk at all….

5. Trump doesn’t lie. All the articles that have ever been written about him are wrong. “I don’t know who’s doing the fact-checking here” said Trump….no one can figure out what side of an argument you’re going to take next, sir.

6. Wait, Mike Huckabee is still in this race? Hmm…okay.

7. The fight for time to speak by candidates is like when children fight for the swings at recess. “It’s MY TURN!”

8. The candidates are keeping such close tabs on each others’ time to speak that when it’s their turn to talk they forget what they stand for. They actually forget to talk about anything except how they didn’t get enough time. The last guy who complained about that didn’t have the best ending….Mr. Webb #LostTribute

9. WAIT, CHRIS CHRISTIE IS STILL HERE? He just started talking….and it’s been an hour into the debate. I just choked (again) when his slight lisp piped up. Welcome to the debate!

10. You know who Huckabee is voting for! (Hint: It’s the orange candidate with a permanent wind-blown face)

11. Christie doesn’t like Fantasy Football talk….he just lost the votes of all males from the age 25 – 45 #sorrynotsorry

Cheers to our future!

xOx