10 Things to Question about Your Life after Undergrad

Questionable phases of life after gradation. We all go through them and we all survive them….well most of us do. Here are 10 things to question:

1. Receiving a job offer

Because of all the talk about the difficulty of getting a job, if you do receive an offer, it becomes very suspicious. Wait, I only applied to 20 jobs and actually got one? Whereas, you hear horror stories of people applying to 40 jobs and getting one interview and no job. It is a paid position, right? Not an internship? Always be on high alert when something happens too easily in the working-world. Unless you got hired at McDonald’s, then just nod and accept it.

2.  Old friends

Some of your old friends act like they have too much of their shiznit together. Those are the ones you need to watch out for. No one has that much of their life pieced together yet. And with the politics starting to erupt already for 2016, some of your friends’ true colors are coming out over Facebook…question their reasoning. Block.

3.  Your relationship status

If you feel like Christ Traeger, you are probably questioning yourself, too. Leaving undergrad means leaving all of your friends, and who knows when you will all be together in one spot again?

4. All the work you did in undergrad

All that stuff you had to memorize for exams was beyond pointless. It was actually wasteful. Wasted the space in your brain, wasted your time, wasted thousands of note cards. Question why you tried so hard do to do well in those useless courses. And then be ready to get mad.

5. Your ability to keep it all together

If you can fake it enough to act like you have it all together, you deserve an award. If you think you have your life all put together nicely, you need to question yourself. Don’t lie to us, you rub your face into a pillow every night before bed like our trusty, relate-able buddy, Nick Miller.

6. Your career choice

Think you know what you want to do after you graduate? Guess again. Chances are you will question yourself with every job application or every grad school assignment. If all else fails, become a wizard; it’s as close as you will be to a real job after you graduate anyway.

7.  Your ability to stay professional at all times

Think you will act like a mature adult now that you have a diploma? Chances are you will become very sarcastic very quickly. Professionalism is boring anyway, so question those who act like it all the time. Plus, you’re still a child in the eyes of many.

8. Your so-called undergrad accomplishments

Think being secretary in an undergrad club will get you far in the job market? Think that one intramural team you were on will help? It won’t. And the lack of actual “accomplishments” on your resume will only make you feel worse. I hate that part of a resume anyway. Can watching Netflix be on there?

9. Your interview capabilities

Maybe give yourself a practice round or two before that job interview. And if you don’t, question why you aren’t. No one is actually prepared for an interview. That’s the joke of the year. It’s also something they didn’t teach you in undergrad, so question your college/university on that one.

10.  Your ability to flirt

If you think you’re still in ‘the game’, you’re probably wrong. Question why it hasn’t worked out for you so far.

xOx

5 Stages of Grief Over “Parks and Rec”

The fantastic show, Parks and Rec, is coming to an end this season. This series taught us that being a little neurotic with your work is okay, or being really dumb doesn’t mean you won’t find a job or a purpose in life, or hating everything in the world won’t keep you from finding love, or being married to an extremely hot woman still won’t make you the most popular man in the office. Here’s to Leslie Knope and her crew! And here’s to the tissue-overload!

Phase 1: Denial

Ron Swanson, you good sir have said it correctly. There literally must be some mistake. I mean, only 7 seasons, and they are calling it quits? There is no way. It must have been an error in the paperwork. Amy Poehler, did you by chance switch your divorce papers with the scripts? This is the beginning of the end. But not really, right? I mean, Netflix has already stepped up its game and put Season 1- 6 online. So it can never end…correct?

Phase 2: Anger

Honestly, this may be the stage I stay in for a while. Donna couldn’t have said it any better: What. The. Bleep. If someone was standing right next to me, they would have a huge black eye right now. I am just having flashbacks to all the times “Really Jerry?!” was yelled, or when Leslie didn’t get her way right away, or when Ron spouted on about the government. All of these acts of anger/aggression are exactly how I feel right now. When the last episode shows, someone will die.

 

Phase 3: Bargaining

Okay, so maybe they say it is the end of the road…for now. We all must stand up to petition for a Parks and Recreation Reunion season already! Do not give up on hope. Is it too much to ask for this show to live on forever? We bargain our time watching other shows to beg for more Parks and Rec.

Phase 4: Depression/Sadness

There wasn’t just one scene snapshot that could properly depict all the emotions we will feel. It is as rough as this, times one-hundred. Ann, you beautiful, naïve, sophisticated newborn baby. Crying and depression and emotional pains are all the feels I will have during this last season.

Phase 5: Never Accepting

We now reach the fifth and final stage of depression. Even though we are to accept the end of the series, it is just not possible. Just smile through the pain, attempt to laugh it off, and never accept the ending of Parks and Recreation. NBC, you’re on my list.